My brain is strange, or so I’ve been told. As far as brains are concerned, mine is probably the neural equivalent of a platypus: odd and unusual and entirely nonsensical; the type of WTF thing you’d expect to get if God dropped acid during one of his more creative moods. Like a hyperactive toddler it often goes wandering off on its lonesome in directions I never anticipated, and frequently finds itself at odds with the world around it. (Or maybe we all feel that way at times.) Alas, it happens to be the only brain I have, after that D.I.Y lobotomy attempt ended rather poorly. So I use it to navigate this world as best I can.

Sometimes, when I get the chance, my strange brain and I will watch AFV, the show formerly known as America’s Funniest Home Videos, because I guess like Prince they decided symbols are cooler than actual words. When I’m watching the show, I’m often reminded of how humor is a matter of perspective. Just ask the many unlucky souls featured in its never-ending montage of ‘people getting hit in the nuts’ videos. Or those falling off roofs. Or getting nailed in the head by a shovel. Or slipping on ice. Come to think of it, we humans seem to find pain quite hilarious, at least when it’s happening to someone else. Curious that humor and other people’s misfortune should be so intricately linked. I’m not sure what this says about us as a species, but that’s a subject for a different post.

On one episode of AFV, there’s a video of a chubby little girl, probably somewhere around 8 or 9 years old, who decides she’s going to create a make-up tutorial for all the world to see. She starts out extremely excited, talking to the camera as though she were a seasoned social media pro: “Hey guys, hey guys, look at this, here’s what you do,” she emphatically and repeatedly pleads, as she names off all the A-list celebrities she’s going to help them look like. A little bit of rouge and a dab of eye shadow, and you, too, can look just like Christina Aguilera.

It soon becomes apparent that this girl doesn’t know the slightest thing about makeup. In fact, I’d wager she’s never used it before. Applying makeup, as it turns out, is a little bit trickier than a child’s imagination would think it to be. So the bright red lipstick gets a bit out of control, and the eye shadow she’s using progressively gives her what appear to be two black eyes.

By the time she’s through she looks like a miniature Batman villain. All she needs is a little clown white and some green highlights to pass for Heath Ledger’s understudy. Her confidence wanes and she looks at herself in the mirror with obvious frustration. She possesses two functional eyes. She can see this isn’t what she envisioned when she so eagerly set out on this venture. It’s at that time when a male figure (I’ll assume it’s her dad) walks into the room. He gives the little girl a scolding before whisking her away to the nearest sink for a much-needed scrubbing.

For most people the video is hilarious. But for me and my strange brain this clip is actually quite heartbreaking too. You can watch in time-lapsed clips as a child’s spirit is being bruised and broken. She goes from happy, excited and proud of herself in the beginning to frustrated and then thoroughly defeated by the time her dad walks in to put a stop to the nonsense, thus ending her short-lived career as social media influencer before it ever had a chance to get started.

This clip strikes me as a microcosm of so many things in life. It’s an example of how children (even young ones) are measuring themselves against what they see on social media, in ways they may not be consciously aware of. A little girl, wanting to feel beautiful, is eager to present herself to the world. She wants to be seen as capable, helpful and talented–the type of person others appreciate and admire–only to wind up feeling discouraged and disappointed in the end. She’s certainly not the first to turn to social media seeking validation only to wind up crushed.

It reminds me of the sometimes unbearable chasm between our desires and reality. Between the way we all want to present ourselves to the world and the way we’re actually received. The child’s world is one of endless possibilities, where being, doing and accomplishing seem as easy as dreaming these things up. Then real life comes along and slaps us around with its rigid limitations, leaving us all looking like little girls who were way too liberal in applying blue eyeshadow. Oh how much better life would be if the rosy opinion we hold of ourselves actually translated into the real world.

It’s an illustration of how difficult it can be to match our intentions with outcomes; something we all should keep in mind when it comes to our dealings with others. Remember that actions typically originate from a good intention, so try to be a little more patient and understanding, whether those actors be children or adults.

Perhaps most of all, it’s a snapshot of how children’s eager optimism is slowly spirited away. It happens in the form of thousands of tiny little cuts just like this one–an insult here, a scolding there, a series of rebukes, a few epic fails–until belief in oneself and the endless possibilities we envision for the world stands hanging by a thread (one that others are eager to pluck). This, as they say, “is life.”

Some reconciliation with this brick wall we know as reality is necessary for the growth and development of children. After all, self-delusion is not an attribute that serves one well in the “real” world. But then again, it’s important to try to ensure they’re not crushed by this wall. Maybe we adults could use a little more of what children have.

So the next time your preschooler decides to go all Picasso on the walls; or a coworker does something dumbfounding; or your loving daughter decides it’s a good idea to test her fashion sense with all your best clothes while snacking on Cheetos and eating a red popsicle, take a step back and try to see the world through their eyes as they first envisioned it. Be gentle. Be kind. It probably seemed like a wonderful idea when they thought it up.