A flood of anxieties, questions and concerns will come over children once they learn that their parents are divorcing. Here are some of the common concerns that they’ll grapple with:

Concerns about parental love and affection

  • Which parent is leaving? Will I see them?
  • How often will I get to see Mom/Dad?
  • When will I see them?
  • Will I have to choose sides?
  • Will Mom/Dad abandon me or stop caring about me?
  • Is Dad as upset with me as he is with Mom?

Concerns about disruptions in their lives

  • Who am I going to live with?
  • Will I have to move?
  • Am I going to switch schools?
  • Will I still see my friends?
  • Will I be able to live with who I want to?

Worries about their divorcing parents

  • Where will Dad go?
  • Where will Mom live?
  • Will she be alright? Will he be lonely?
  • How will Mom manage without him?

Concerns about the cause of the divorce

  • What made this happen?
  • Did I do something wrong to cause this?

Concerns over the little things that matter to children

  • Who will drive me to soccer practice?
  • Who will take care of me when I’m sick?
  • What about my birthdays? Christmas?

Throughout the divorce process, parents should try to regularly ask their children if there’s anything they’re worried about. Children may not have anything initially, or may not know how to voice their concerns. Other worries may arise as different stages in the divorce are completed, giving them new things to think about. So it’s best that you continue to offer opportunities to voice such concerns, so that any fears they have can be addressed.